The Sparks Family

Wow. Almost a year since I have posted.

2012-01-04T11:43:00.000-08:00

Well, it has been nearly a year since I have posted on this blog. Funny that I read a buncha blogs but I don' t update mine. I am going to try to stay on top of my blog this year. (I say this every year)
Anyway, I have to say that I am happy to see 2011 gone and I am excited for 2012. I am planning on setting GOALS for 2012 rather than resolutions. I know they seem to be the same thing, but I prefer the word goal. Yes, I have issues.
Here is my recap of 2011, the good and the bad:

I was able to maintain my weight loss and continued to lose. I am currently weighing in at 103lbs. Although a lot of people are complaining about me being too thin, I am a perfect size for my height.
On October 9th, I was able to finally get a tummy tuck. My surgeon removed 11.5lbs of skin from my abdomen. I was pleased to know that I did not require ANY liposuction whatsoever!
Michelle (one of my BFF's) came and spent a week with me so that I could heal from surgery. She was amazing and recovery was HORRIBLE!
Aryanna moved back in with her Dad in southern Cali. I have mixed emotions about this one.
I continued to attend college while working.
I continued to work at a job that I love!
My kids are healthy.
My marriage survived another year.
I bought a new car 2007 Lexus IS250. Love!
We moved into a new house. It's a rental, but I like it none the less. I actually could see myself buying this home if the opportunity presented itself.

As far as goals for 2012 go, here are a few:
Save money by cutting expenses where I can.
Put more time and effort into couponing.
Remember to pay tithing ALL of the time.
Go to the Temple more.
Read my scriptures daily.
Pray more.
Stregnthen my relationship with my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.
Open myself up to make more friends.
Be a better wife and mother.
Maintain my weight loss.
Get my Boobies fixed, they look awful! They are gone. I have nothing. Nada! It is sad.

There are more, but this is what I am willing to share today.

It has been so long!

2011-01-13T09:44:00.000-08:00

This picture was taken on the day of surgery. April 27, 2010
This was taken in January 2011

It has been so long since I have posted. There has been so much going on in the last 10 months that I need to catch up on. What started my absence was I had Gastric Bypass surgery on April 27, 2010. On the day of surgery, I weighed in at 270 lbs. It is simply horrible! I am embarrassed that I allowed myself to get to that point. I wore a size 22/24 pants and a 3xl top. This was not the mom that I wanted to be for my children. I did not want to be the "fat mom" that her kids were embarrassed of every time I go to their school. The journey after surgery has been amazing! As of today, I currently weigh 147lbs and I continue to lose weight. I am wearing a size 6 pants (OMGosh! I can't believe it) and a small or medium shirt! It has only been 8 months since surgery and so much has changed. I do not recognize myself in pictures! Unfortunately, I still see myself at 270 when I look in the mirror, but hopefully my brain will eventually catch up with my body!

Dominic's Birthday

2010-03-03T11:15:00.000-08:00

So, yesterday Dominic turned 32! He is now the same age as me for a grand total of a month and a week. I had to work, so we ended up going out to dinner at Cattlemen's Steakhouse. The food was awesome! We even shared the brownie sundae for desert. After that we went to the movies and saw When in Rome. It was adorable! I laughed so hard! We both really enjoyed it! It was only 8:30 when we got out of the movie, but we were both so tired! We ended up going home and watching Pawn Stars in bed & fell asleep during the second episode. We both felt so old.

Anyway, it was overall a nice day and I am glad that we were able to spend time together for his birthday.

Happy Birthday Dom! I love you!

It's been a while!

2010-02-24T15:50:00.000-08:00

Gianna in front of the treeGianna, Aryanna & Nick

Dom & Nick

Aryanna

OOPS....I did this one twice.

Elder Rose

Dom with the coveted XBOX360

Aryanna gets her electric guitar!

Nick gets his leapster

Gianna holding up cozy jammies!

OMGosh...I just realized that I have not even posted 1 time yet this year. I am oficially a slacker! Well, I guess that I am going to start with Christmas 2009. The kids had a great time. All of the kids (and Dom) got everything that they wanted. The only thing missing was my side of the family and Bailey. That kinda stunk, but we really had a great time. We also had the missionaries over for Christmas dinner!

For New Years, the girls all spent the night at Grandma Pat's house and Nick stayed with me & Dom. We just hung out. It was nice to stay home for New Year's!

Merry Christmas!!

2009-12-24T10:23:00.000-08:00

I can't believe that it is already Christmas Eve! Time has flown by. I still have so much to do! I am leaving work at 12 today and I have to go get stocking stuffers, some boxes, egg nog, cream cheese, a couple of gifts, pick up a prescription from my doctor! I feel like a chicken running with my head cut off.

Tonight I will be taking the kids out to look at lights, so that should be fun. Once we get home, I have new PJ's for everyone and we will finally decorate the tree! (please don't judge me) LOL!

At 10 AM tomorrow morning, my MIL is coming over to watch the kids open their gifts. It should be nice. Then I will start cooking. We will be having a total of 10 people eating at our tiny table! Dominic, me, Aryanna, Gianna, Nick, Grandma, Glenn (Dom's friend), Glenn's "friend", Elder Wood, and Elder Ward. I am having Ham, baked mashed potatoes, creamed spinach, applesauce, rolls, cheesecake & pumpkin pie.

Merry Christmas! Photos to come!!

First Appointment!

2009-12-15T09:32:00.000-08:00

Tonight is our first appointment for marriage counseling with LDS Family Services. I am nervous & excited. Our counselor's name is Adam. I hope that he knows what he is getting into!

We Can Work IT Out!

2009-12-02T13:41:00.001-08:00

At 2:30 AM on the day after Thanksgiving, Dominic & I made the decision for him to come back home. Things are going well & we will be attending counseling through LDS Family Services. I am so happy to have him home again. He came over for Thanksgiving. We had a wonderful meal! Pat was there and Dominic had invited a friend of his named Glenn to join us for dinner. Glenn had another friend who did not have anyone to share Thanksgiving with, so she came along as well! So, my table quickly filled up with people! I love it when Thanksgiving is like that. It is simply the best!

IT'S FINALLY HERE!!!!!

2009-11-19T09:49:00.000-08:00

I have been waiting for New Moon and now it is finally here. I am so excited that I can hardly contain myslef. I will be at the midnight showing with Aryanna and a friend of hers named Taryn. The only thing that sucks is that I am going in Roseville, so I am a good 40 minutes away from home! I have never been so excited about a movie before. I even have my Team Edward shirt! I just can not wait until midnight tonight to finally see it. I have never gone to a midnight premiere for anything before! And to top it off, I have to go to work tomorrow! YUCK!!!

I am sure to post pics tomorrow of the madness that is New Moon!

Broken....and Thankful Day 1

2009-11-13T11:35:00.000-08:00

I have been doing a lot of praying lately. I have always found that I pray regularly, but I do not think that I have ever in my life felt this BROKEN. I have always been the strong one. I have always been able to convince my heart to do what my mind wants, but not lately. Every molecule of my being wants my marriage back. I want to hear the rhythm of my husbands breathing at night next to me. But at this point, I believe that I am the only one who wants this. On Monday, I heard from someone that my husband was at Target with another woman. He insists that he was there with her because she is his friend’s cousin who needed a ride. I don’t believe him. I don’t understand how he can spend time with another woman after us being apart for such a short time. We spent 10 years together. This hurts. It would hurt less to chew my right arm off. After speaking to him on Monday about the event with another woman, I have decided that I will not be speaking to him on a social level. I will no longer help him with the day to day tasks that I have continued to help him with since he left. It has been 3 days since I have had any conversation with him. He knows that I am hurt. I do not think that he realizes how broken I am though. I don’t think that he realizes that I cry every day. I don’t think that he realizes that I pray for him daily both in my personal prayer s and with our children. For the last 2 days a line from the song “On My Own” from the Les Miserables soundtrack keeps going through my mind. That line is “Without me, his world will go on turning”. Why does it have to hurt so much that his world is continuing while mine is stopped? I mean, I am taking care of the day to day stuff. Most people have no clue how hurt I am or how sad I am. In my entire life, I have never felt this. I do not understand why I do not have the same control over myself that I always have had in the past. I want to suppress my feelings and have everyone believe that I am fine! I want to be fine! Okay, I have to stop thinking about this now. I am getting a headache from crying!

Onto something better, I have decided that starting today through Thanksgiving Day, I am going to post daily something that I am thankful for.

So today, I am thankful for my wonderful small group of friends that I have. I appreciate you all so very much. I am so grateful for each of you and the amount that you enrich my life. Kerrie, I can never tell you how thankful I am for our friendship. You have been through hell 7 high water with me and never left my side. Your husband rebaptized me and you escorted me through the Temple. You will truly NEVER know how much you mean to me.

"Mom, when are you going to go on a date?"

2009-11-05T15:47:00.000-08:00

It is so hard for me to fathom that it has already been over a month since Dominic moved out. I am really starting to settle into my new “normal”. At first it was hard to sleep. I was so used to hearing his rhythmic breathing next to me. I still only stay on my side. For some reason, I will not venture over to his side.

Last night, Gianna & Nick spent the night at Grandma’s house. Aryanna and I were supposed to attend Young Women’s in Excellence at church, but it was cancelled. So, the two of us had the night to ourselves. We went to dinner and stopped by Target. While we were at target she asked me, “Hey Mom, when are you going to go out on a date with someone?” I froze. I then explained to her that since I am legally married (I did file for a divorce though), if I went out with someone it would be adultery. I also explained to her that I am healing, that I still love Dominic and that my primary focus is her and her brothers & sister. It gave me such a glimpse into what her life was with her dad. You date someone, you break up & quickly move onto the next one. Dating is so far off of my list of priorities. Heck, I still have my wedding ring tan line! I am hardly ready to date! Furthermore, dating scares the crap out of me. My morals and lifestyle has changed since I was last single. I now have 2 failed marriages under my belt. I need to work on me. I need to fix myself. I need to let go of some of my control issues.

I know that even though I am doing okay right now, things will get harder. I know that Thanksgiving & Christmas will be emotional for me this year. I am not good at facing my emotions!! I pray that I continue to be the source of strength for my children though this difficult time in our lives. I hope that they always know how much I love them.

Also, thanks to Alabama Slacker Mama for posting about prayers for Ty. I appreciate it so very much!

Prayer Request

2009-10-29T09:22:00.000-07:00

There are days that I sit at work and think to myself that there is no way that I can handle another thing being put on my plate! This past month has been one of those days! LOL! I think that sometimes I get caught up in my own life and I fail to recognize that there are people close to me that are going through so much more than me. Now for my prayer request!
There is a little boy that we have known for about 3 1/2 years named Ty Boatman. Ty and Gianna were in the same primary class before we moved and they were also in the same class in school. Gianna has always considered Ty to be one of her really close friends. Anyway, in March of this year, Ty was diagnosed with a stage 4 Wilm's Tumor. He has had a kidney removed and the cancer has metastasized to his lungs. he is currently undergoing chemotherapy & radiation. It has been so very difficult for Ty. He has always been active. He plays football, likes skiing, loves motocross, & swimming. He has been really sick for the last 7 months. On Saturday, Ty was able to make a play for his football team. The media was there to cover it. Look here: http://placersports.com/detail/133455.html. His parents have set up a Caring bridge site for him also. You can view that here: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/tyboatman. I ask everyone to please say a prayer for this little boy. He is going through so much and their family is staying true to their faith, loving their Heavenly Father & doing the best that they can. I have a feeling that they need to be lifted up right now. So, please, pray for Ty.

With a new season comes major changes

2009-09-30T10:27:00.000-07:00

On Monday, Dominic moved out. As I just typed those words I have a strange mix of emotions. I wish that I could say exactly why he left. I wish that I could say that we had been fighting and so this is the route we elected to take. But I can say none of those things. My home life has been normal. There have been no explosive fights. There has not been any contention. About a month ago Dominic started hanging out with some new people. That is the only change. So, my husband decided that he was moving out on Monday and he could care less about me or the kids. He is not willing to discuss anything or attempt to make things right. My moods change minute to minute right now. Once second I am livid and the next I am hurt. I would imagine that is normal. I hurt for my children. I am scared because this is a whole new life. When I got divorced from my first husband it all made so much sense. I knew what I needed to do. Unfortunately after I left, I made some bad moral choices in my dating life that cost me my church membership. I have repented from that and I am now an active, endowed member of the church. My problem is this, I do not know how to be single and LDS at the same time. I know that sounds crazy. But it is true. I am grieving right now at the loss of my marriage. Gosh this hurts! I know that I need to get rid of the anger that I have because unless I do the Holy Ghost can not dwell within me. My family NEEDS the comfort of the Holy Spirit! I am trying to be strong and in all that is going on right now but part of me wants to curl up and cry. I feel so bad for my kids. They are having a tough time with this. A good friend of mine said to me the other day that I deserve to be happy, I deserve to have a strong priesthood holder over my family and I do not have those things. I am obedient in the gospel. My patriarchal blessing talks about me going through the temple with my spouse and having an eternal family. I deserve an eternal family!
Last night I was speaking with my Bishop and we were talking about how hard I have tried in this marriage and he said something that I will never forget: "Our Heavenly Father is perfect & loving and HE lost 1/3 of his children." That has made me think. I can not blame myself for Dominic's decisions. They are his alone.

Morning Sickness!!!

2009-09-24T10:58:00.000-07:00

Before anyone freaks out, NO, I am NOT pregnant! My doctor decided that because of all of my girly issues lately to have me start taking birth control pills. Now, normally this would be no big deal, I would just take the daily pill to control things and that would be that. But there is a problem. For the first week I have to take 2 pills a day rather than 1. So last night, I pop out 2 of the little suckers! I take them and then go about my evening. By 9:30 the room was spinning. I ended up just laying in bed praying not to throw up. This morning I still felt the same. I even considered calling in sick to worl (that NEVER happens). So as I sit here, I feel like I am in my first trimester of pregnancy. This is just awful! I spoke with the doctors office this moring and they suggested not taking both at once. I wish someone told me that yesterday!

I Won!

2009-09-23T09:33:00.000-07:00

The Birthday Cake! Last year I bought 2, this year I thought out of the box! (Both kids were in Spokane for their birthdays, so we celebrate once they get home)Bobby & Marta (oh and Bella the dog). Please excuse my messy kitchen counters.

Gianna & Nick patiently waiting to blow out the candles!

Dominic, Aryanna & I (gosh I need to lose weight!)

Nicholas flying!

Robin over at Alabama Slacker Mama was having a contest about nicknames for your kids, spouse, etc. I entered and I won the raffle. WOW!!! I am so surprised. Let me just tell you, I needed it. I have been having such a crazy week. And the thing is that it is bad crazy, not good crazy.

I don't want to dwell on the bad right now (I will share it at some point), so I will focus on the happy & exciting things that we have going on. As many of you know, Aryanna was baptised. It was such a special day for our family. My mom, brother & Marta (my brothers girlfriend) all came up for the joyous occasion. It was so nice to have family here for the weekend. We swam, celebrated birthdays & had the baptism. It was the first time that I have met my brothers girlfriend. I just need to say that I heart her! She ROCKS! I have never seen my brother treat someone so well. She really compliments him. The kids adore her! I can only hope that he marries her.

9/11

2009-09-11T09:40:00.000-07:00

There are no words to express the sadness that comes to mind when I think about how much our country changed 8 years ago. I remember watching in horror as the images replayed on television. I can't believe how much life has changed since then. Since 9/11/01, I have had 2 children, I was rebaptized into the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, my husband was baptized, Aryanna has moved back in with me, she was baptized, Dominic's father died, we have moved 8 times, I finally got my dream job, I went to the Temple. As I sit back today, I think about everything that I am blessed with. I think about people that I know who have survived the war in Iraq. Today, I see cars driving around with huge flags waving. This poem was e mailed to millions and I am sure most of you have read it. Everytime I read it, I cry. This poem was found to be the last thing that Dominic's dad read on his e mail on April 25, 2002 moments before he left for work and was filled in a car accident. This poem was read at his funeral also. But, today, this poem helps us remember September 11th and all that we have to be greateful for.

If I Knew

If I knew it would be the last timeThat I'd see you fall asleep,

I would tuck you in more tightly

and pray the Lord, your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time that I see you walk out the door,

I would give you a hug and kiss and call you back for one more

If I knew it would be the last time I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,

I would video tape each action and word,

so I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time,

I could spare an extra minute to stop and say "I love you,"

instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.

If I knew it would be the last timeI would be there to share your day,

Well I'm sure you'll have so many more,so I can let just this one slip away.
For surely there's always tomorrow to make up for an oversight,

and we always get a second chance to make everything just right.

There will l always be another day to say "I love you,"

And certainly there's another chanceto say our "Anything I can do?"

But just in case I might be wrong, and today is all I get,

I'd like to say how much I love you and I hope we never forget.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, young or old alike,

And today may be the last chance you get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow,why not do it today?

For if tomorrow never comes, you'll surely regret the day,
That you didn't take that extra time for a smile, a hug, or a kiss

and you were too busy to grant someone, what turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today, and whisper in their ear,

Tell them how much you love them and that you'll always hold them dear.

Take time to say "I'm sorry,""Please forgive me," "Thank you," or "It's okay."

And if tomorrow never comes, you'll have no regrets about today

GIANNA & NICK ARE COMING HOME!

2009-08-17T10:35:00.000-07:00

So tomorrow morning Gianna & Nick will be boarding a flight (by themselves) and flying back home just in time to start school on WEDNESDAY! Can you believe it? My baby is starting Kindergarten. Gianna will be starting 2 nd grade and Aryanna will be in 7th! There is still so much to do! Tomorrow after the kids land, I have to go get haircuts, try on all of Gianna's new clothes to make sure that they fit, go to the middle school for the campus tour & Aryanna's schedule, go to the elementary school for Nick & Gianna's class list, and somehow spend some quality time with the kids that I have not seen since June! I have missed them so very much! They are coming home to a new house (they will love it), a new ward, and a new school. I am really excited to see them again. I can't even begin to explain how much I have missed them.
On Saturday, the 22nd, we will be having a Back to School Pool Party & BBQ with our friends the Hales. It will be a nice way for all of us to relax from the first week of school craziness. There is also a ward BBQ that night, so we might go to that also.
Then on Saturday, the 29th, Aryanna is getting baptized! We are so excited for her. My mom and brother & his girlfriend will be coming up for the weekend. While they are here, we will also celebrate Gianna & Nick's birthday since they were gone for it. It is really nice that we will be having some family attend the baptism. We tried to get Tim to come, but he said that he could not get the time off of work. It breaks my heart that he will not be there for his daughter. She is making such an important decision to be baptized.
Anyway, I need to try to create a schedule for my crazy week! (And to think that I was supposed to be at Education Week right now)

Summer Vacation, Moving Day and Other Ramblings...

2009-07-23T13:31:00.000-07:00

So, I know that I keep saying that I will update more often, but then I go a whole 4 months since my last post. I will try to be better about posting!

Okay, gosh, where do I start. Our life has been crazy for the last 4 months.

Let me start by announcing that on May 8th, Aryanna moved in with us permanently. We are so excited to have her with us full time (we wish Bailey were here also). She has matured into such a beautiful young woman. She went to Girls Camp this year and she has been taking the missionary discussions. She has even committed to getting baptized when Gianna & Nick get home from Spokane. She has grown so much in the last 2 1/2 months that she has been with us. She is active in Young Women's, she is dressing modestly (a virtue that was not important to her Dad prior to her being here) & has gained a Testimony of the Book of Mormon. She felt the Holy Ghost at Girls Camp. I am so happy for her to have the fullness of the Gospel in her life. I am confident that the Holy Ghost will guide her and protect her in life. She will be starting 7th grade in August and she is looking forward to school. She has made a lot of friends in the church. Since we are moving on Saturday (more to follow on that), she is nervous about the new ward. i am sure that she will make friends easily.

Gianna is up in Spokane for the summer with Grandma Pat. She will be turning 7 next week. I honestly can not believe how time has flown by! Gianna was very happy to have Aryanna move in full time. G will be starting 2nd grade in August at a new school. She even FINALLY learned how to tie her shoes. We have been trying to get that done for over a year but I just did not have the patience. G is so very grown up. Sometimes I think that she is a 65 year old stuck in a 7 year old body. She is so hilarious. She is always giving me a play by play of what everyone around her is doing or has done! She absolutely kills me.

Nick is a busy little man. He is just a monkey! He turned 5 last month (my baby is already 5!!!). Nick started wearing glasses a couple of months ago. He looks adorable in them and he does not even give me a hard time about wearing them. Nick is also up in Spokane for the summer. He is having a lot of fun driving Gianna crazy. Nick has gotten really close to Aryanna since she has been here. He is always concerned about her and he loves her to pieces! Nick will be starting Kindergarten in the fall. Our district does a full day kindergarten. That is so awesome. I am looking forward to him starting school. I am sure that he will enjoy himself. =)

As far as the family, we are moving back to Auburn. We could not be happier. The situation surrounding the move has been a tough one. We have been through some serious trials over the last month or so, but we are making things work. The house that we are moving into is beautiful. We could not be happier! It makes me sad that even though we have been in Lincoln for almost 3 years, there is only 1 thing that I will miss. I will miss having Michelle so close. We have become really good friends and I have enjoyed spending time with her. I am only moving 30 minutes away, but it still is not the same. She has been my saving grace on several occasions. I am excited about going to a new ward. i am excited about a new calling. I am grateful that my Heavenly Father has helped us to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am grateful that my trials are small in comparison to Joseph Smith's. I am grateful that I was not a pioneer trekking across the country. I am grateful that I have the church to keep me grounded. I am grateful for prayer. I will be grateful for the wonderful friends that I have to help me stay somewhat sane!

So, in just under 24 hours, we will be moving. I am so excited!!! We get keys tonight! I will post some pictures of the new house as soon as I can!

A Good Day

2009-03-10T21:44:00.001-07:00

Today I had to fly down to Ontario to go to court for David & Kerrie. There are several upsides to this, the most important being that I was able to spend some time with Aryanna and Bailey. granted, I would have preferred to spend forever with them, but at least I was able to see them for a little while. I have such an enormous amount of love for them. I miss seeing them everyday and I pray that when they grow up they will know EVERYTHING and finally be able to understand why things are the way that they are now.

Another great thing is that I am able to spend time with my best friend and her family. I am so grateful for her constant positive influence in my life. I can only hope that I am 1/2 as strong and steadfast as she is. I do not know what I would do without her in my life.

Finally Some Pictures

2009-02-13T20:39:00.000-08:00

So I finally was able to get a new cable to hook up to my camera so that I can upload pictures. So, finally, here are some pictures of Bella and the kids!

EVERYONE IS GONE!

2009-01-22T11:47:00.001-08:00

As I was getting to bed last night, I realized that everyone was gone! My house did not have a guest staying with us. It was kinda sad. The kids were quietly sleeping and I had the opportunity to think about things that have gone on over the last 5 weeks. Dominic's mom was here for a few weeks and then my mom was here for a week. It is funny how you can get used to people being in the house and it just becomes natural. It is also nice when I have someone at the house to look after Gianna and Nick when Dominic and I just need a break. I now am here in Northern California without any extended family. If I did not love my job so much I would be outta here. I am trying to understand why my Heavenly Father wants me here (in Nor Cal). The people that I care about most (besides the husband and kids) are not here.
I think that I am just struggling emotionally right now. I am really struggling with my calling at church, I am struggling in my marriage, I am struggling financially, Aryanna is still not speaking to me. There is just so much on my plate. I am so very grateful for so many things that I have. I know that I am really fortunate. Maybe today is just one of those days that we all have where I wish that I could just curl up in bed and let the day pass me by.
I have been blessed with so much love and support around me. I have been blessed with wonderful children, a nice home, a BEAUTIFUL car! It is interesting to me how much family affects how you feel day to day.
I really enjoyed my mom being up here. I wish that she could have stayed longer. We had a great time and she helped out so much. Thanks again mom for getting so much work done while you were here!

Wow!!!

2009-01-15T10:10:00.000-08:00

I am so shocked that it has been nearly a month since I have written in my blog. So much has been going on it seems like I just crash when I get home from work. I also have not yet found my charger for my camera, so I can't take any pictures of the kids, but I think that I am just going to buy a new charger.

Anyway, Christmas was nice. It was modest for sure, but Gianna and Nick had a great time. On the 26th, I went down to LA. I was so excited because I was supposed to see Aryanna and Bailey (I have not seen them since March). Once I got down there, I could not get ahold of them for the life of me. I called and called, I even just showed up at the house, but no one was home. It broke my heart to not be able to spend time with them. While I was in LA, I got a puppy. I have had such a hard time adjusting to Petunia not being here that I needed something that fills the void. I still pray that someone calls me and tells me that they have her. But, I do not see that happening. So, we now have Bella. I will post pictures soon. So, while down in LA, I stayed with Kerrie & David. I am so fortunate to have such great friends in my life. I have been friends with Kerrie for 12 years. I am floored at what wonderful kids she has raised. I remember them when they were newborns (except for Q, he was a toddler). Kerrie & David have beautiful, intelligent children. They have a strong testimony and I am honored to know all 3 of them. Kerrie makes me want to be a better person and mother. I love all of them as if they were my own family.
After I got home, I was finally able to get ahold of Aryanna & Bailey. Aryanna is really mad at me right now and not taking to me. I am so sad about this. I would lay down my life for my children. I have made decisions in life that they do not understand, but I have done it for them to have a better life. I made these decisions out of love, nothing else. Do I regret some of those decisions? Sure I do. But, whats done is done. I can only hope that as Aryanna & Bailey get older, they come to realize that I never wanted to hurt them. I have always loved them. I never stop thinking about them. So, anyway, Aryanna not speaking to me hurts a lot, but I understand that she is hurting right now also. I can only hope that she is able to see past her anger to realize that I tried REALLY hard to see her.

We are finally getting settled into the new house. It now feels like home. My mom is here right now. She has been such a help in getting laundry done, folded & put away, washing floors, etc. She is doing all the things that I just do not have time to do. I appreciate it so much. It is nice to have my mom around to "take care" of me. I will be sad to see her go home on Monday. =(

It is FREEZING!!

2008-12-18T14:33:00.000-08:00

I have been so busy that I am just not able to write at night. By the time I get home, feed the kids, do homework, get them to bed, unpack, do laundry, I am just exhausted! I am hoping that once things settle down after the first of the year I can be much more dedicated to posting thoughts and pictures.
As many of you know, my Pug, Petunia, is missing. She got out last Friday and we have not been able to find her. I miss her so much. She always slept with me and I was so close to her. We have put up 200 signs and also posted "lost" announcements in the newspapers, on craigslist and with the local pound. I am just heartbroken. We have really struggled this past year and I have had my spirits lifted by my dog (I know it sounds silly), I love her so much and I miss her so much!! I just hope and pray that someone calls me and tells me that they have her. I want her back really badly. I am having a hard time sleeping without her. I would appreciate any prayers that you all could offer on my behalf for Petunia's safe return home. =) That is all that I want for Christmas.
We are trying to get settled into the new place. It is so hard to move! I could not pack as I would have liked to, so we have tons of bags and boxes of mixed things. I guess that is what happens when you have only 4 days to find a house and move in.

It's Always Something

2008-12-10T10:47:00.000-08:00

I am so very sorry that I have not been writing. Things have just gone haywire in our lives! We had to move because our home was being foreclosed on, but our lovely landlord never mentioned that to us! So, we had to find a home and move FAST. We moved into our new home on Monday. I am so grateful that we were able to find something so very quickly. I am confident that my Heavenly Father played a significant role in making that one happen. I am really looking forward to making it through December and getting settled into the house. I absolutely hate moving, but it had to be done. Christmas is going to be tough this year, but it is what it is. I am lucky to have the things that I have. All I care about is making sure that the kids have a good Christmas.

Every Tuesday at Chik-Fil-A is family night. So, I always take the kids there for dinner and they get to play in the play area, get balloon animals, and get their face painted. The LOVE it! Anyway, for Christmas, they have the cow dressed up as Santa and they are taking pictures with the kids.

Introducing Pierre!!

2008-11-22T21:00:00.000-08:00

So, this is the newest member of the Sparks Family. His name is Pierre and he is a 4 month old Fancy Rat. Both of kids have been asking for an animal. They wanted a Guinea Pig, but since I am so allergic to them that was impossible! I was at PetSmart yesterday and I was looking at the animals and the "rat" person told me that they had a very sweet rat that was for sale. I picked him up and he was great. So, now we have a pet rat!!

The Primary Program

2008-11-16T22:26:00.000-08:00

Today at church was the Primary Program. The kids did an awesome job. By the time Sacrament Meeting was over there was not a single dry eye in the Chapel. I am happy that it is done and we do not have to worry about doing it again for another year!

Below are some pictures of Gracie & Petunia playing in a Lincoln Log box. It was really cute.

**I am grateful that I have been blessed with such wonderful friends**

Nick's First Day of School!!

2008-11-14T23:54:00.000-08:00

Finally has started Preschool. He was very excited until we actually got there. He did not want to stay. His teacher Miss Jill pryed him off of my leg and so I left. Apparently it only took about 10 minutes and then he warmed up to the whole idea. He got to paint and so he was stoked!

He told me afterschool that he likes it and he can't wait until he goes back on Monday. So, as promised, here are the pictures from his first day today! enjoy!!

This is a marble painting that Nick did for me. He was so proud!!
Here he is walking to the classroom!

Just getting out of the car!

Getting his backpack on

Just before I woke him up for school.

**I am grateful today for the cooler fall weather!**

Another Week Goes By!

2008-11-12T21:58:00.000-08:00

I am so very sorry for the delay in updating the blog. Things as always have been super busy. I am very happy that the election is over! I hope that the tension over Prop 8 calms down. It is kinda scary out there right now.

Nick has been on the waiting list for Preschool for 7 months. I finally got the call on Friday that they had an opening for him. He is so excited. He should start some time this week. I have to call tomorrow morning at 7AM to see when I am supposed to come in. I will post pictures of his first day at soon as it happens.

Thanksgiving is coming up quickly. We are not doing anything major. It will just be Me, Dominic, Gianna and Nick. This is the first time in my life that I have not had my extended family with me. It makes me kinda sad.

I miss Aryanna & Bailey so much! I also miss my family in Southern California. It is so hard not having people closer. I have not seen my Dad in almost 3 years. I hope that I see my Mom, Dad and Grandma! I really miss them.

ELECTION DAY IS HERE!!

2008-11-04T11:46:00.000-08:00

Today is such an important day for all of us. Today is the day that we have to take a stand for our beliefs! Many of us have worked very hard to try to keep marriage between a man and a woman. We MUST vote today! We MUST vote YES ON PROP 8!! Our children deserve to be taught by us. We deserve to have marriage protected. I am so tired of hearing that this proposition is about hate. I feel that this proposition is about love! Did you know that now on marriage licenses it says "Party A" & "Party B"? No longer does it say husband & wife.

I am voting YES ON 8 because I love my children, because I love the Constitution and because I love the Scriptures (All of them!!) and because I love my Heavenly Father!
Please everyone, vote today!!!

**I am most grateful that I have the opportunity to vote and have my opinion heard**

Happy Halloween!!

2008-11-01T23:45:00.000-07:00

We went out trick or treating last night with The Hale's. It was raining off and on, but the kids had a great time anyway! All of the kids looked great. For some reason a lot of houses were not handing out candy. It was really strange. Last year nearly every house had lights on and were handing out candy. but do not worry! The kids got more than enough candy!! LOL!!!

Gianna and Ryan

Nick after washing his face!

Nick and his "Best Friend" Devin

Gianna & Jaci

Gianna and Nick ready to go!!!
**What I am Grateful for today is that I am so proud and happy that I made the decision to come back to church and I have chosen to live the gospel. I am so grateful that I am able to go to the Temple and I am grateful that I have a testimony of the restored Gospel. I am so happy that I know that Joseph Smith saw the Father & the Son in the Sacred Grove.**

The 2nd Time!!

2008-10-29T21:27:00.000-07:00

As most of you know, I have been crazy busy and I have had some medical issues this past week. I am currently getting a 2nd opinion. So, I will be sure to keep all of you posted!

Election Day is almost here! I am prayerful that Prop 8 & Prop 4 pass. I am going to be sign waving on Saturday afternoon for Prop 8. I also signed my friend Michelle up. I owe her one =)

Last Friday, we had our Ward Halloween Party. The pictures are posted. The kids had a great time. They were excited to be able to wear the costumes before Halloween.

This year the school picture of Gianna was not very good so we took advantage of make up picture day! I got the pictures today and I must say that they are MUCH better!

I have decided that after every post, I am going to also include something that I am for. We are all so blessed and I need to make sure that I count my many blessings!

**I am grateful that my Heavenly Father has blessed me with 4 beautiful children. Even though Aryanna & Bailey are with Tim most of the time, I love them more than I could ever say. I have such a deep love for all of my kids. I am just so grateful to have them in my life (no matter how crazy they may make me). So, that is what I am most grateful for today.

Aryanna, Bailey, Gianna & Nicholas...I love you all so much and I am honored to be your mom!**

KIDS FACE PAINTING

2008-10-23T21:31:00.000-07:00

The kids love getting their faces painted every Tuesday for Family Night at Chick-Fil-A. Here are the pictures from 2 days ago. Nick was Spiderman and Gianna was a Butterfly!!

SORRY!!

2008-10-21T13:09:00.000-07:00

Things have been so busy that I have not had the chance to post for 4 days! Sunday was my wedding anniversary! I can't believe that Dom and I have been married for 7 years already! So, Sunday, we went to dinner at Cattlemen's (Shhh...Don't tell anyone! I know that it was on a Sunday!!) LOL! Anyway, we had a really nice kidless dinner and by the time we got home it was 9 and I still had to get kids ready for bed! So, I was way too tired to post. And then last night Gianna started having this wicked cough. I gave her some cough medicine and she passed out! She at least slept through the night, so that was a bonus!! Nick on the other hand is going though a sleepless phase. Lat night at 8:45, I put him to bed. He was up every 15 minutes asking me "important questions" like, "How much longer until it is daytime?". He finally went to sleep at about 11:30 and was up again at 6:15. I woke up to him staring at me and when I opened my eyes all he said was, "Mommy, it's daytime now!", I made him go back to bed. So, between the sick child and my insomniac, I have not been able to post any pictures. I will do my best to take some new pictures tonight and post them. I know everyone wants to see the Halloween Buckets!! =)

Fall is in the Air!

2008-10-18T23:18:00.001-07:00

Gianna and Nick on the trainGianna and Nick on the hayride
Gianna and Nick on the train.Gianna and Nick next to the stinky cow!
Gianna and Nick waiting for the Pig Races to start!

I am so excited fall is finally starting. We finally got all of of our pumpkins. We got a white pumpkin for the first time this year. I can't wait to carve them. They will all look awesome. Michelle (my friend & neighbor) helped me to make Gianna a skirt to go under her Cinderella costume. In used 5 yards of netting. Gianna is going to have the fullest Cinderella costume around! We decorated buckets for Halloween. They turned out really cute. The kids decorated them all by themselves. I will take pictures of them tomorrow.

Pony Rides

2008-10-17T01:01:00.000-07:00

Sorry that I have not posted for a couple of days, We have been super busy here. Anyway, the Pumpkin Farm had pony rides and the kids were so excited! Gianna rode a white horse named "Candy" and Nick had a brown horse named "Diego". They both had such an amazing time riding them, They both were naturals on them. Anyway, here are some of the pictures that I got of them riding.

Doesn't she look so comfortable riding! And this was a big pony, not a tiny one at all!

Nick getting to know Diego

Hello Again!

Nick trying to give me 5 as he goes around

Look, NO HANDS!!

Nick is so proud of his acomplishment, He looks so handsome here!

Gianna looks so pretty and so natural here. I love it !

And now, Nick with NO HANDS!!

Thanks again everyone for stopping by! We love and miss all of you.

More From the Pumpkin Farm

2008-10-13T21:53:00.000-07:00

So, I have added more pictures from this weekends journey to the pumpkin farm. As I upload the pictures, I realize just how grateful I am to be a mom. There are plenty of days where I am ready to change my name from Mom and hide in the garage, but at the end of the day, when I am able to sit on my bed and post the pictures, I relive the fun and the craziness and it is that I realize how lucky I am. My Heavenly Father has trusted me with 4 children. They are all happy, healthy and beautiful. I just wish that Aryanna and Bailey were closer to me. I miss them more than words can describe. I just pray that they know just how much I love them and I hope they know how important they are to me.
Anyhow, here are more pictures from this weekend. I hope that you all enjoy them!!

Gianna's Close Up

Gianna comes down Coyote Mountain

Nick's Close Up

Nick looking for a pumpkin

Gianna and Nick with the pumpkin we chose

Gianna trying to fly

Nick looking Cool

The kids on the back of the hayride

Bishop's Pumpkin Farm

2008-10-12T11:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, we went to Bishop's Pumpkin Farm in Wheatland. We went with the Hales. It was a lot of fun. We went on a hayride to pick out our pumpkin right off of the vine. The kids had a great time, they also got to go on a train ride, pan for marbles, and even ride a pony. We spent almost 6 hours there. I honestly think that we are going to make a family tradition out of this. I can only post so many pictures a day, so I will post them daily with other new pictures/updates.

The Sparks & Hale Kids (from left to right) Ryan, Jaci, Nick, Gianna, Devin, & Nathan

Again, the troops (from left to right) Devin, Ryan, Gianna, Jaci, Nick & Nathan
Me & Gianna
Gianna panning for marbles
Nick showing off his marbles

New Haircuts

2008-10-09T21:57:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures of the kids that I took tonight. They were looking through family photo albums. We only have 2 days until we are going to the Pumpkin Farm! I am so excited. I can't wait to take pictures of them there!! Enjoy these!

Nick looking at pictures

Silly man Nick
Gianna and Nick
Sleeping Beauty
Front of the new haircut

This is the back of Gianna's new haircut! It looks so cute on her! Princess Gianna
Goodnight to everyone from the Sparks Family!

Prop 4

2008-10-09T11:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I received a phone call from Planned Parenthood asking me to vote NO on Prop 4. I have been so busy with Prop 8 that I was clueless about what Prop 4 really is. So, today, I looked online to see what Prop 4 entails. Here is what I found out:

Proposition 4, or the Abortion Waiting Period and Parental Notification Initiative, also known to its supporters as Sarah's Law, is an initiated amendment that will appear on the November 4, 2008 ballot in California. It proposes a new amendment to the California Constitution.[1],[2],[3]
The initiative would prohibit abortion for unemancipated minors until 48 hours after physician notifies minor’s parent, legal guardian or, if parental abuse has been reported, an alternative adult family member.

I ask all of my friends and family to PLEASE vote YES on Prop 4. The schools and Planned Parenthood have NO right to assist our daughters in getting abortions without our knowledge or consent. An abortion is something that you can not take back. We need to have the opportunity to council with our daughters and work with them to find an appropriate solution. This is the job of parents!!
Please, Vote YES on Prop 4!!

I Wish that our Family was Closer!!

2008-10-08T21:55:00.001-07:00

Dominic and Gianna, I like this picture of the 2 of them! Gianna with her face painted Nick with his face painted as a doggy!
The 2 dogs! Homer & Petunia

Today was one of those days where I would have given anything to have family closer to home. Some days the list of things that I have to do is way too long. I am so emotionally and physically drained that I can barely think. I just managed to get the kids to bed and it is almost 10:00! It seems like when I am just so exhausted, the kids take advantage of it. Anyway, I will be back at Education Week in 10 & 1/2 short months! =)

As I promised, here are more pictures!

Another Crazy Day

2008-10-07T21:18:00.000-07:00

AREN'T WE SO SILLY!!

They were being silly before bed. Anything to stay up for just 1 more minute!!

Nick making his scary/silly face. This is how every picture he poses for would be if I allowed it. Everytime he sees himself like this it just cracks him up!

As all of you know, today was an emotionally draining. I am so grateful that Bailey is safe at home. The kids are so excited about the blog. They keep bugging me to post the pictures where they are doing silly faces. They have assured me that everyone wants to see them! So, here they are. I hope that they bring a smile to your face and warm your heart!

We are going to the Pumpkin Farm on Saturday, so I expect to be posting some great pictures!

Pictures, Pictures and More Pictures!!

2008-10-06T22:14:00.000-07:00

It is already after 10pm and I am just now getting around to posting the pictures on here. I am planning on posting daily photos and updates for everyone.

They both look so adorable (and clean) on the way to church last weekend.

This is Gianna and Nick tonight just before bed after saying goodnight to Grandma Pat!

Nick and Miss Petunia!

Gianna wanted to have curly hair for the day, so we put rollers in her hair! She thought that she looked so grown up. She insisted that I take a picture of it!

The Crazy Kids

2008-10-05T22:28:00.000-07:00

Nicholas and Gianna were in Spokane, Washington for the summer and it happens to be that they both were up there for their birthdays. So, when they came home, we had 2 back to back birthday nights! Nick had a Pirates of the Caribbean cake! And here is Miss Gianna! She had to have a Princess cake! She loves Princesses. She had also lost her 2 bottom teeth over the summer. She tells EVERYONE about her teeth falling out! It rained on Saturday and it was also General Conference. So, we spent a lot of time at home this weekend. The kids really punished me for that one. They drove me crazy! I am so drained! It has been really tough on me with Dominic going to school. I am so proud that he is going, but he has to drop the kids off to me at my office at 5PM and then he does not get home until about 10:30 or 11. I have this schedule until April. I can't wait until Dom finishes school and gets a job. It will help us out so much.

My First Posting!!

2008-09-30T15:15:00.000-07:00

So, this is my first ever posting on my very own blog! How exciting.I decided that this would be a really cool way for our family and friends to see everything that is going on in our crazy lives!! It is only Tuesday and it has already been a crazy week. Gianna has been sick for the last couple of days. She spent last night throwing up on my floor! So, she has been home from school for the last 2 days. We got her Halloween costume this past weekend. She is going to be Cinderella!! Nicholas is getting his costume tonight. I am so happy that fall is finally here! The leaves are beginning to change color, the morning air is crisp. It is so beautiful! I can't wait to finally be able to pull out my sweaters and have a fire going in the fireplace.
General Conference starts this weekend. I absolutely LOVE conference. We get to have church in PJ's! I usually make french toast for breakfast and we all eat and watch conference. It is so nice to have a prophet to give us direction! I wish that I could actually be in Salt Lake and be able to watch conference live. I can't even imagine how strong the Spirit must be felt there.